Yakuza Apocalypse

(Takashi Miike/2015/Japan)

You don’t press play on a Takashi Miike film and expect a run of the mill cinematic experience. The man is known for his derangement of genres and narrative and in Yakuza Apocalypse he seems to pack almost every style and conceit he’s ever previously employed into the one sitting. Without trying to elaborate on every twist and turn, because we’d be here all day, the basic premise is this: Kageyama works for local gangster Kamiura, who happens to be a vampire. A rival cartel, consisting of a coffin carrying witchfinder general, an geeky assassin and a kappa water demon, rolls into town challenging Kamiura’s reign. They kick his ass but before he dies he bites Kageyama, turning him into a vampire, who then vows to destroy the cartel with the remnants of the yakuza gang. The cartel summon "the modern monster" who is a man in an oversized mouldy frog suit, he needs help up and down stairs but has unbelievable martial arts skills. The rest of the movie is taken up with the battle between Kageyama’s crew and the cartel and the frog. Have you processed all that? Because that is the bare bones of what goes on. At the start of the movie Kageyama says “My life was like tepid water. Then I met the boss.” Well Takashi Miike boils the bejaysus out of that water over the course of two hours and there is absolutely no point in trying to make sense of it. Strap yourself in and enjoy the ride because it is at times frustrating, at times hilarious and all the time fun. It ends in mid skirmish, suggesting there could be a sequel but for me the scenes towards the end take on the feel of a video game. The monster levels up and the final cut is as if someone pressed pause to make a cup of tea during an epic battle on a games console. This is a marmite flick, even Miike fans will rankle at it I suspect but if you can let the attention deficit style wash over you there’s lots to enjoy.

(3.5/5)